Our trip to South Carolina

Stephen's birthday is Thursday (the 31st). He would have been turning 25 this year. Mom and Dad had to go to court to settle up with the insurance company. Since it was so close to Stephen's birthday, we decided to have a balloon lift-off to celebrate.

On Monday, Mom and I left to go to Athens, GA to pick up my mom's mom Marie. We picked her up and went to the nursing home to visit my great-grandmother Lois. We saw my cousin Kendra and her 3 boys while we were there. We left for Greenville and met up with our MADD Advocate and good friend Wendy. She's been helping us out since shortly after Stephen died, but I never had the chance to meet her in person. We talk on the phone a lot and feel like we're old friends. She organzied a balloon liftoff for the month anniversary of Stephen's death. So, we met with her and waited for Jamie to get off work. Jamie is the old friend of Stephen's whom he had dinner with the night he died. We went to Jamie's house to get ready for dinner. Jamie let us stay with her. It was me, mom, Grandma Rea, Wendy and Jamie. It was like a slumber party!

Kim (Griffen's sister) and her husband Lee came over to Jamie's to meet. Lee's dad was having surgery on Tuesday, so she came back from her vacation for it, and it just happened to be the day we came up. It was so nice to meet her. She and I have gotten to be so close because we've experienced the same loss and are both being proactive about speaking out about alcohol abuse. She was so nice and I am so happy we were finally able to meet in person and give each other the hugs we've been wanting to give each other over the last few months.

(Click to enlarge)

Kim and I




Anyway, Stephen's friend Keri and her sister Kristy came over from Brevard for dinner. Kristy and I have become pretty good friends online since Stephen died. She's had some tragic loss in her life and she has really been a source of comfort and healing for me. Dad and Linda were on vacation from Phoenix already, so they headed over to Knoville, TN and picked up my younger brother Frank and came down to Greenville. The 10 of us went to dinner at Wild Wing Cafe. That's the last place Stephen was before he died. He and Jamie ate there that night. It got a little emotional at one point, but I'm glad we went.

Jamie, Wendy and I



Frank, Dad and Linda



With Keri and Kristy



Linda, Me, Dad and Frank



Me, Mom and Grandma Rea




When I was at my grandmother's house, I found a video tape of Stephen with me and Jake and Kinsey at Christmas 2006. He had brought his then-girlfriend Amanda home from Arizona and we went for lunch with Grandma Rea. I was so excited to find that tape because I have been so mad that I never made any video of Stephen with the kids. I wished there was some tape so the kids could have some video to remember how he was with them. He was such a wonderful uncle to them. We watched the video at Jamie's before we went to bed.

Tuesday morning, we all got together for breakfast, and while Mom and Dad went to court, Wendy took Marie, Frank and I walking around downtown Greenville and we went to the suspension bridge over Reedy River Falls. After court, Mom, Dad, Linda and I went to see Sgt Brock of the MAIT team to find out all the details of Stephen's accident. After that we headed out to the crash site to have the memorial celebration for Stephen's birthday. Casey came over from Brevard and we all had a nice time. It was very emotional for all of us.

The cross and sign



Casey and Me



Getting ready to send our messages to Stephen



Watching them float to Heaven



The balloons



Frank, Dad and Me



Dad, Me and Mom



My Dad



I got a little emotional



We didn't get back til after 1am this morning. It was a loooong 2 days but I got to do a lot of the things I've been waiting 11 months to do and meet the people I've been wanting to meet.

I'm going to add some more pictures from our walk downtown as soon as Dad emails them to me.

Trooper hit by drunk driver while question another drunk driver

Lance Corporal Lee Gillespie, SCHP (Left) and Stephen Spence, offender (Above)



Trooper Hit by Drunk Driver While Making Another DUI Arrest
Suspected drunken driver clips cruiser as patrolman makes public intoxication arrest

By Nita Birmingham (Contact), Noah Haglund (Contact)
The Post and Courier
Saturday, July 26, 2008

A suspected drunken driver clipped the back of a state trooper's car early Friday on Interstate 26 at Spruill Avenue as the officer was arresting another driver for public intoxication, authorities said.

The impact propelled the patrol car into the trooper and the man he was arresting, but both were treated at a local hospital and released. A Charleston County sheriff's report said that Stephen B. Spence, 37, of Summerville, was driving the Nissan Altima that hit the trooper's car. Spence was arrested on a charge of driving under the influence.

The 1:20 a.m. crash happened as Lance Cpl. Lee V. Gillespie was out of his car with the driver of a disabled sport utility vehicle. The blue lights were running on the trooper's car, said Sid Gaulden, director of the Department of Public Safety's Office of Executive Affairs.

Authorities gave this account:

A Mount Pleasant crime scene technician was on her way home when she saw a Ford Explorer stopped partially in traffic in the westbound lane closest to the center retaining wall. A tire had separated from one of the rims. She notified the Highway Patrol, stayed until Gillespie arrived, then left.

Gillespie and the driver of the sport utility vehicle, Bradley Stephen Tamblyn, 36, of Mount Pleasant, were standing in front of the patrol car. Gillespie was in the process of arresting Tamblyn on a charge of public intoxication when the Nissan came from behind and hit the trooper's car.

The trooper's observations of the scene led to Tamblyn's arrest, Gaulden said. Gillespie could not arrest Tamblyn on a charge of DUI because the trooper did not see him driving, he said.

The impact knocked the cruiser into the center retaining wall, then into Gillespie and Tamblyn. Both men were treated at Medical University Hospital. A woman who answered the telephone Friday at Tamblyn's house would not comment.

Spence would not do field sobriety exercises and refused to take a breath test, the Sheriff's Office said. He said he'd had a couple of beers and a container of beer was in the right rear passenger seat of the Nissan, the sheriff's report said.

It was at least the second crash in Charleston County since Wednesday night in which alcohol-related charges were filed. In the earlier incident, a motorcyclist was fatally injured in Mount Pleasant and a woman was charged with felony DUI.

"All I can tell you is my guys are locking up someone every night, sometimes two or three a night," said Lt. Chip Searson, a traffic supervisor with the Charleston Police Department and MADD Charleston County Community Action Site leader. "We're just trying to keep people from killing each other out there."

Police Chief Greg Mullen has rededicated the department's efforts toward DUI enforcement, Searson said. Department arrests for DUI increased 242 percent from 2006 to 2007, he said. Officers made 143 arrests in 2006 and 489 last year.

Gov. Mark Sanford in April signed a new law to toughen the state's DUI penalties and remove enforcement loopholes that Sanford's office said had been used in the past to give defense attorneys an advantage in court.

The bill increases penalties for most first-time offenses and all second and subsequent offenses and removes community service as a sentencing option for second and subsequent offenses.

It also introduces a "tiered" penalty system, with greater punishments for offenders who are grossly intoxicated, and creates tougher penalties for refusing to take blood alcohol tests, Sanford's office said.

The new law takes effect in 2009.

From: http://www.charleston.net/news/2008/jul/26/trooper_driver_hit_on_highway48835/

Mental problems

Stephen's death has given me something new to think about and worry about. Seeing first-hand how quickly a life can be taken, I am constantly paranoid and afraid that I'M GOING TO DIE. Mainly I'm afraid of dying in a car accident. Granted, I do drive a Ford Expedition, and probably would do more damage to whatever vehicle I hit than my own, I still have the fear of plunging into water or someone pulling out in front of me. Basically, I see myself having the same accident Stephen had, sans the motorcycle. I am afraid all the time. Stephen's death has made me so aware of my surroundings while I'm driving. I know I'm being careful. I'm not worried about my driving. I'm worried about all the idiots driving around me.

Not too long ago, Bill and I were driving and were mooned by the teenage driver of a car in the lane beside us. Yes, you read it correctly. The DRIVER mooned us while he was DRIVING. Putting his cruise control to good use, I'd say.

I'm constantly worried that I don't have a last will and testament. I'm worried I don't have life insurance. All things I could fix, just haven't found the time to do it. I would like to think I have plenty of time, but we all know that's not a given.

I have only discussed this with two people. But I feel that others who are going through this need to know they're not alone. It's a natural feeling. If anyone has gone through this and has a remedy, please let me know. I guess getting the insurance and will taken care of would be a huge relief.

But the thing that bothers me the most is dying and leaving my family behind. Leaving someone else to raise my children. And leaving my mother childless.

This makes me happy

The days when I think I'm just gonna cry all day, I am thankful for my kids the most. They keep me busy. They make me laugh. Jake is the comedian, and I swear, the day Stephen died, his soul went into Jake's body. I've never seen 2 people more alike!

This is what makes me laugh:



And this: (He's trying to say High School Musical 2.)

I've got a new dragonfly at the house.

So I came home the other day and found we have a new dragonfly buddy at our house. We still have that cool green and black one hanging around. (See it here.)

Here's the new one. He's so pretty! He's blue!

This hits really close to home.

Last December, an 18-year-old boy in the town I live in, Lake City, FL, was driving under the influence and rear-ended a car, killing a man and his toddler grandson. Then that car hit a car carrying 3 other people. He received his sentence on Monday. He got 35 years! He got 15 years for each person who died and 5 years probation for the DUI with bodily injury. I just think how quickly the case was resolved. It only took 7 months. Here we are, 10 months after Stephen's death, and we have yet to go to trial. There has been a plea offer made, but the offender has asked for an extension, so we won't know whether or not she'll accept it until September 1 (6 days before the 1-year anniversary of Stephen's death.)

I've posted the articles about the accident that I talked about above. I'll put the original article from last December first, and then the one from yesterday's paper, next.

This is the young man. The expression on his face makes me sick to my stomach.




Aaron Russell Adler

Wreck kills 2, hurts 3
By TROY ROBERTS troberts@lakecityreporter.com
Published: Monday, December 3, 2007 9:52 PM EST

A Lake City teenager was charged with DUI manslaughter after a wreck Saturday night took the lives of a Lake City man and his 2-year-old grandson.

Aaron Russell Adler, 18, was charged in the deaths of Henry C. Camiel, 61, and 2-year-old Craig Camiel Jr. Adler was charged with two counts of DUI manslaughter and three counts of DUI with serious bodily injury after his SUV struck the rear of a car driven by Henry Camiel, Florida Highway Patrol reports state.

Three Lake Butler residents also suffered critical injuries in the crash, according to reports.

At approximately 6:30 p.m. Saturday, FHP troopers responded to a wreck on U.S. Highway 441, just south of Lake City near the intersection of County Road 242. The investigation revealed Adler was traveling northbound on the roadway and quickly approached Camiel's car, did not slow down and struck the rear of it.

The impact forced Camiel's car into southbound traffic, where he collided with a pickup truck driven by George R. Griffis, 57, of Lake Butler. Cathy Griffis, 50, and Kathrine Touchton, 81, also of Lake Butler, were in that vehicle at the time of the crash. All three were taken to Shands at

the University of Florida in Gainesville with critical injuries. Reports indicate their conditions had improved on Monday.

According to reports, neither seat belts nor child restraint were in use in the Camiel's vehicle at the time of the crash.

Adler was not wearing a seat belt at the time of the crash and was not injured.

“The family of Aaron Adler would like to offer their sincerest apologies and condolences to the victims and their families of the senseless and irresponsible criminal act that was visited upon them this past weekend,” said Aaron Adler's father, Russ Adler, in a statement released by the family. “Our prayers and heartfelt sympathies are with them.”

Lt. Mike Burroughs, public information officer for Troop B of FHP, said Russ Adler has promised his full cooperation into finding the source of the alcohol that his son consumed. Investigators are attempting to determine how the 18-year-old came into possession of alcohol.

“This is a far-reaching tragedy that could have been prevented by the interaction of someone calling Tow-To-Go for Mr. Adler's safe transport home, as well as his car being towed,” Burroughs said of the AAA program that can be utilized by calling (800) AAA-HELP. “As we approach the Christmas and New Year holidays, we are seeking cooperative help from the hosts of parties, bartenders and community members to help FHP stop underage impaired driving.”


Teen sentenced to 35 years in prison
19-year-old was under the influence at the time of a fatal wreck.
By TONY BRITT tbritt@lakecityreporter.com
Published: Wednesday, July 16, 2008 6:11 AM EDT

A Lake City teenager was sentenced to more than 30 years in prison for his role in a December 2007 fatal wreck where he was driving under the influence of alcohol.

Aaron Russell Adler, 19, was sentenced to 35 years in prison and five years probation. The sentencing was done Monday in a Columbia County Circuit Court. Adler was initially charged in the deaths of Henry C. Camiel, 61, and 2-year-old Craig Camiel Jr. Adler has been incarcerated in the Columbia County Jail since his arrest Dec. 1, 2007.

Adler was charged with two counts of DUI manslaughter and three counts of DUI with serious bodily injury after his SUV struck the rear of a car driven by Henry Camiel, according to Florida Highway Patrol reports.

Adler, who was represented by Jeffrey Siegmeister in Monday’s court proceedings, pleaded no contest to two counts of DUI manslaughter, two counts of DUI with serious bodily injury and one count of DUI with bodily injury. He was found guilty of all charges by Judge Julian E. Collins. Tina Seifert was the prosecuting attorney for the State Attorneys Office.

Adler received 15 years prison time for each DUI manslaughter count and five years in prison for one of the DUI with serious injury charges. He was sentenced to five years probation on the second DUI with serious injury charge and accredited for time served on the DUI with bodily injury charge.

According to police report accounts of the wreck, FHP troopers responded to the Dec. 1 wreck on U.S. Highway 441, just south of Lake City near the intersection of County Road 242, and their investigation revealed Adler was traveling northbound on the roadway and quickly approached Camiel’s car, did not slow down and struck the rear of it.

The impact forced Camiel’s car into southbound traffic, where he collided with a pickup truck driven by George R. Griffis, 57, of Lake Butler. Cathy Griffis, 50, and Kathrine Touchton, 81, also of Lake Butler, were in that vehicle at the time of the crash. All three were taken to Shands at the University of Florida in Gainesville with critical injuries.

According to reports, neither seat belts nor child restraint were in use in Camiel’s vehicle at the time of the crash.

Adler was not wearing a seat belt at the time of the crash and was not injured.